Posts Tagged ‘fuk off i got biskit’

Musician fail

I’d like to re-introduce you to a man called Fred Durst. You may remember him wearing a red cap, bleating away as the lead singer of the phenomenally awful band, Limp Bizkit. Or maybe you remember him as the man who got pwned by Britney Spears*.

Well, in the recent inaugural annual traditional “Iwilldothatformoney Awards for Dumbasses and Numpties”, we bestowed upon Mr Durst the honour of Worst Ever Guitar Solo Ever.

An honorary achievement award was also given out to every member of the audience who had actually paid money to hear it.

You can watch his stunning effort to single-handedly destroy the eardrums of 1,258 people behind the cut.

Warning: this video might make you vomit a little bit in your mouth.

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Learn the words, otherwise you're going to fail. It really is that simple.

The English language is not fragile. It is not a delicate flower. It is not to be tiptoed around. It is a robust, industrial framework; a machine made of millions of interlocking parts. This machine is incredibly versatile: it can be disconnected and reconfigured and put to work in billions of variations. It is the backbone of our civilisation: the a reason why England was once such a colonial powerhouse, and why America is what it is today.

I will never understand why some people can’t be arsed to learn the bloody language.

Some disclaimers before I get into this. I am not talking about foreigners for whom English is a second language. I am not talking about the difference between American English and British English – frankly, these differences only came about because the Yanks used to be better at spelling than us. I’m not even talking about the more complicated intricacies and idiosyncracies of the language. I’m not Lynne Truss. For a start, I’ve got a sense of proportion.

I’m talking about the fucking native nob rabbits who flat-out abuse our mother tongue, and who can’t be bothered to learn any of the words.

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